Monday, August 19, 2013

Making our writing interesting for the reader

We read a very funny book about what teachers do when the kids go home. If you haven't read it before you should.
We used the book as inspiration for our writing. We used humour to make our writing funny for the reader because that is what we liked about this story. 

Ring ring ring schools finished for the day YAY! The teachers all have ... fun. There's lots of food. A teacher even thew a pizza onto the wall like a frisbee. Then theyall said "Food fight!" Mr Cottrell didn't like peas so he threw them on Mrs Coombs glasses. Splat! And she couldn't see. Suddenly! a pavlova was thrown across the room and splashed on Mrs Heibner's face. With her fingers she wiped it on her face and tasted it. She said yum. They all had to clean up before the kids had to go back to school. When the kids came back to school they on the floor.
Author Skyla

Ding ding ding. The children ran to the school bus. But the teacher were planning something. What are they planning? They made paper aeroplanes. They threw them around. They made a water slide in the hall. They found a room. They put goggles on and they made an experiment. Suddenly...boom! Then they went to Room 5. They partied and the door opened and in came Mr G. He shouted "WHAT ARE YOU  DOING! Can I join? "Yes" said Miss Wilson. Mr G joined in . Then the children went to Room 5 and partied as well. They partied all the way to lunch.
Author Thomas

Ring ring ring ring schools over kids. The kids go running around school looking for their parents. The teachers grab their tummy stuffers and put their pillows in them. They squash them in their t-shirts. The bump into each other. Boom boom. The principal told the boy teachers to do ballet. The boys had to wear tattoos and they had to twirl in circles on their tippy toes. Some boy teachers bumped into the wall 'Ouch."
Author George

After school teachers start to play with nerf guns. They pulled the trigger...boom bang! the guns go. They go wild. One bullet gets stuck on Mr M's bottom. It went so fast it made a mark on his bottom. Now they start to zoom around the corners on scooters. They went up ramps and did tricks. They did tail whips back flips and loopty loops and the sun began to go down. During the night they played Mine Craft. They built towers houses rollercoasters. They were staring at the computer screen. they didn't realise the sun coming up. Whoopsys! The suns coming up. "Teachershurry up and clean with me" yells Mrs H.
Author Beau 


  1. Very interesting writing, Room 5!

    I love that book and I like your wonderful ideas too. The language you use is super powered!

    Thank you Beau for letting me star in your story. It was worth the embarrassing injury! Those teachers sure are clever on Mine Craft.

  2. Awesome Room 5
    Your stories are amazing.
    I like how you got the idea from a book.
    They are really funny.
    Keep up the good work.
    Well done

  3. Hi Room 5 and Mrs H

    Your stories are so much fun! I can imagine all the teachers putting pillows down their tummies! What a great picture that gave me in my head when I read it. All the stories made me giggle. What a mess it would be to clean all that food up. I am looking forward to reading your stories to the iKids tomorrow. I really need to get my hands on that book. Do you think Mrs H would lend it to me?

    Keep up the great writing.

    From Miss Revell
    Marvin's iKids, Maraekakaho School

  4. Great work room 5.
    I like your story's.
    When I read then they made me laugh.
    Keep writing.
    Well done.

  5. Wow, i wish teachers did all these exciting things when the kids go home!! I would love to read this book Mrs H. I haven't seen it before! Thomas, we loved the bit about the teachers putting googles on and doing experiments and also making a water slide in the hall. Wouldn't that be fun!!